Drinking provides the perfect time for appropriate social interaction. We sit around the fire and drink whiskey and tell stories about a man with a hook or the college student who didn’t turn on the light. Sometimes we talk about our future; the plans we have and the plans life has for us. Occasionally, we realize that some people’s plans are dumb.
[For the sake of my future drinking/social opportunities I will refrain from accurate names.]
Our social interaction session began with the idea of the perfect age to produce a child. Different numbers were kicked around and an exact age was never decided. I found all of the ages to be too young. I would like children some day but I’m no where near ready to be responsible for a life. Could I do it? Yes. Is one ever ready for the shock of a child? No. I’ve heard parents kick this phrase around many times: “I just want my children to grow up in a better world than the one I inherited.” At 18, how has a parent effected the world so that their child grows up in a better world? What about at 21 or 25? It’s true some people have reached their potential at 25. I hesitate to argue that one’s life potential could be reached by 18 or 21 for the sake of transcendentalism. Do we not owe to our future children some action that leads to a positive reaction in our world?
A couple sitting around our interactive fire discussed the possibility of having children in the near future. First for a little background: She is 18 and four days, he is 21, he is unemployed and uneducated, she employed at the minimum wage level and beginning college in the fall. The 18 year and four day old girl stated that she wanted a child by the age of 21. After I caught my head that simply shot off in amazement, I couldn’t think of anything to say other than “Why?” I don’t remember her response. I apologize for my journalistic shortcomings. I did think about my life at 18. I considered what a child raised by a 21 year old would become in the future. How would I have raised a child at 21? Even at this moment I am absolutely stunned by the naivety in wanting a child at 21. Its fun to play house and to sign your future wedded name, but waking up in the middle of the night to change diapers at 21 is not what I ever imagined.
One comment I do remember: “Part of life is having children.” This is true. Childbirth is a miracle. It is absolutely amazing. I look at my nephew (age 4) and see both my sister and brother-in-law. Two people I truly respect. Everything can’t always be planned, but their child was born at an appropriate time. I hope I am blessed enough to have children some day, but I know at 21 I would not be prepared, both physically and mentally, to raise a child. My question to the 18 year and four day old would be: “In having a child at such a young age what other parts of life have you ignored?”
All of this discussion brings me around to a political point (boo). Mississippi is a state in poverty. Conditions have improved, though we have a long hike ahead. How will this state ever move away from poverty when 18 year old girls want children before they finish college? Simply, we cannot.
Maybe I’m being too negative today. Here’s a blog from a mom who’s got it going on.
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